The Most Advanced Piece of Technology You’ll Ever Pee On

Or, “Enis Reloaded”

If you were at the Old Thresher’s in Shelbina this weekend, you may have heard some rumors flying around about me and Joshua.  They’re true.  Last year we had a baby for my birthday, so this year we’re having one for Josh’s.
Last time that I announced I was pregnant to the internet, I was vomiting uncontrollably and I posted a list of things I didn’t want to forget about my first month of pregnancy.  I don’t have one of those today and I’m not vomiting uncontrollably yet, although I’ve been a little queasy on and off the last couple days.  What I do have for you today is a list of things I don’t want to forget about this year’s Old Thresher’s.

  1. This is the last year my Grandpa Smith will be the president of the Old Thresher’s at Shelbina.  He’s been the president since the year I was born (possibly even before), and it makes me sick that certain idiots have forced him to decide he can’t put up with their crap anymore.  He’s done so much for them, given so much of his time and money.  I don’t know what he’ll do without it.
  2. My sister’s new boyfriend is not as bad as I wish he would be.  I wish I could hate him because I loved her fiance.  But we all (me, Josh, Emily, Brian, Liz, and James) all camped together this weekend and played a charade/pictionary-type game and had a great time.  He plays the guitar and he’s a person and even Oak started laughing at him.
  3. Maybe it’s the pregnancy hormones, but when they gave Christy Maubach’s sash and crown to her little sister and Bobby (Christy’s dad) went out to join his daughter for a picture, I had to fight to keep from crying.  When we were little, the Maubachs were some of my parents’ best friends.  I remember specifically staying at their house one night so my parents could fight.  By then my mom had already decided she was done putting up with my dad’s drinking.  I looked up Christy’s obituary on the funeral home’s website.  All grown up she’s someone I’d never recognize, but I do remember that she was a pretty toddler and that Emily named her first baby doll after her.  Christy’s mother died of cancer last year, so now it’s just her dad, her sister, and her little brothers.  I remember her mother’s face perfectly.
  4. Oak laughed so hard this morning when Grandpa Smith was playing with him, and all Grandpa was doing was saying, “I’m a-gonna get you.”
  5. When I let my parents know I was pregnant, my dad said, “You’re knocked up again?” then he told Josh to get his butt in gear finishing our house.  When I told Grandpa Smith he acted angry.  He yelled, “Another one?  When?” and I yelled, “May.”  When I told Grandpa and Grandma Hudson, they didn’t get it.
That’s enough lists.  I’m sleepy.

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